How Ikigai Enhances Your Self-Compassion and Connection with Others
About Empathy
Empathy is a fundamental human ability that allows us to understand and share the feelings of others. The term "empathy" originates from German and was coined in 1848 by the German philosopher Rudolf Lotze as a translation of the Greek word empatheia meaning "passion, emotional state." Unlike sympathy, empathy means putting oneself in another's shoes and feeling their suffering. This ability is central to our social interactions and helps us build deep connections with others.
The Dark Sides of Empathy
Empathy can distort our perception and influence us under time pressure. Research by C. Daniel Batson has shown that high empathy does not always lead to altruistic behavior but often increases stress levels in the observer, which can eventually lead to withdrawal (Batson et al., 1981). Another danger is bias: we tend to feel more empathy for people who are similar to us, known as "in-group bias," which can be problematic in social and professional contexts (Eagleman, 2012). Empathy can also be manipulated and lead to moral exhaustion, as Fritz Breithaupt explains in "The Dark Sides of Empathy," showing how empathy can lead to political manipulation and emotional exhaustion.
People show more empathy towards those perceived as fair and less towards those seen as unfair or belonging to the out-group (Eagleman, 2012). Neuroscientist David Eagleman has shown how our empathy can be influenced by perceived fairness and group membership.
Compassion as a Solution
Compassion (from the Latin "com-passio" - "to suffer with") goes beyond pure empathy. It involves not only understanding and sharing the feelings of others but also the active desire to alleviate their suffering.
The Trainability of Compassion: Insights from Research
Tania Singer and Olga Klimecki have shown in their studies that compassion can be trained. Compassion training not only enhances the well-being of the participants but can also promote our prosocial behavior. They found that compassion changes the brain in ways that enable people to respond to the suffering of others more effectively and sustainably. These trainings foster specific neural networks associated with prosocial behavior and emotional regulation.
This is due to the brain's neuroplasticity – the ability of the brain to structurally and functionally adapt to new experiences and learning processes. Through regular practice and mindfulness techniques, compassion can not only be increased but also become a fixed part of our behavioral repertoire. Neuroplasticity allows new neural connections to be formed and existing ones to be strengthened, making the brain more flexible and adaptable (Singer & Klimecki, 2014).
Paul Gilbert describes compassion as "a brave and wise motivation to turn towards suffering and try to alleviate it" (Gilbert, 2023). Unlike empathy, which can lead to stress and withdrawal, compassion empowers us to act actively and bring about positive change. Gilbert explains in his book "The Compassionate Mind" that compassion is not just an emotional reaction but a conscious and wise decision based on the perception and understanding of suffering, with the desire to alleviate it (Gilbert, 2009).
Effective Altruism: Rational Helping
Effective altruism is an approach that aims to achieve the greatest positive impact through rational and evidence-based decisions. Instead of acting purely emotionally, effective altruism is based on data and scientific analysis. Tools like the Effective Altruism Funds allow us to use our resources in a targeted and meaningful way to alleviate suffering in the world. These platforms offer evidence-based recommendations on how to best use your donations and time.
Ikigai and the Promotion of Compassion
Ikigai, a Japanese concept often translated as "reason for being" or "what makes life worth living," can provide a strong foundation for a compassionate and altruistic life. Mieko Kamiya describes Ikigai in seven dimensions that contribute to a fulfilling and meaningful life (Kamiya, 1966). Mieko Kamiya was not only a significant researcher but also a dedicated doctor who selflessly cared for leprosy patients. Her diaries and biography "A Woman with Demons" vividly demonstrate the deep compassion she developed.
In her notes, which we have translated, Mieko Kamiya reports on an elderly patient whose compassion and kindness changed the often gloomy and heavy atmosphere throughout the ward. He was a fisherman bedridden due to severe leprosy. The nursing staff allowed him to look out the window from his bed, for which he was very grateful. He repeatedly showed his deep gratitude to the caregivers, which visibly touched and changed them. The valuable notes in Mieko Kamiya's diaries reveal how much her work on Ikigai was shaped by compassion.
Ikigai and Compassion – Mieko Kamiyas 7 Ikigai Dimensions
We can use the seven dimensions described by Mieko Kamiya for a strong sense of Ikigai as a starting point for compassion exercises. Through the modern research of Tania Singer and colleagues in the field of social neuroscience, we know that regular practice can enable sustainable changes:
Life Satisfaction (Seikatsu no manzoku): The feeling that life, on the whole, is good and satisfactory.
Growth and Change (Seicho to henka): This dimension speaks of the ability and desire to continuously develop and gain new experiences.
A Good Future (Yoi mirai): The belief and hope for a positive future.
Resonance (Kyokan): Deep, authentic relationships and the feeling of being understood.
Freedom (Jiyū): The freedom to make one's own decisions and follow one's own path.
Self-Acceptance (Jiko no juyō): Accepting oneself as one is, with all strengths and weaknesses.
Harmony (Chōwa): A harmonious life in balance with oneself and the environment.
Sources
Batson, C. Daniel, et al. "Is Empathic Emotion a Source of Altruistic Motivation?" Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 1981, Vol. 40, No. 2, pp. 290-302 (Batson et al., 1981).
Singer, Tania, und Klimecki, Olga. "Empathy and Compassion." Current Biology, 2014, Vol. 24, No. 18, pp. 875-878 (Singer & Klimecki, 2014).
Gilbert, Paul. The Compassionate Mind. Constable & Robinson Ltd, 2009 (Gilbert, 2009).
Eagleman, David. "The Brain and Empathy." Scientific American Mind, 2012, pp. 45-51 (Eagleman, 2012).
Kamiya, Mieko. Ikigai ni Tsuite. 1966 (Kamiya, 1966).
Bandura, Albert. "Social Learning Theory." Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall, 1977 (Bandura, 1977).
Kirby, James. Choose Compassion: Why It Matters and How It Works. University of Queensland Press, 2022 (Kirby, 2022).
Breithaupt, Fritz. Die dunklen Seiten der Empathie. Suhrkamp Verlag, 2017.
Kamiya, Mieko. A Woman with Demons. Biografie.
Neff, Kristin. Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself. William Morrow, 2011.
Doty, James R. Into the Magic Shop: A Neurosurgeon’s Quest to Discover the Mysteries of the Brain and the Secrets of the Heart. Avery, 2016.
Kabat-Zinn, Jon, et al. "The clinical use of mindfulness meditation for the self-regulation of chronic pain." Journal of Behavioral Medicine, 1982.
Grossman, Paul, et al. "Mindfulness-based stress reduction and health benefits: A meta-analysis." Journal of Psychosomatic Research, 2004.
Kabat-Zinn, Jon, et al. "Mindfulness meditation-based programs for psychiatric disorders: A systematic review and meta-analysis." Journal of Psychiatric Practice, 2018.
